These articles (along with many others) were ghostwritten for Psychology Today in collaboration with Jeffrey Davis of Tracking Wonder between 2019-2021. Tracking Wonder is a creative consultancy based out of upstate New York.
The Paradox of Expertise
Published June 27, 2019
Views: 25,964
We tend to glorify the people whom we consider ‘masters’ of their craft. Just look at the celebrity chef craze that has taken the world by storm over the past decade.
We praise the long, grueling hours chefs like Thomas Keller or David Kinch put into mincing, filleting, and sautéeing until cooking became second nature to them. Their precocity and all-consuming passion to become the best in their field are held up as the reasons for their success. In the culinary world, as in most professions, the stories of the few set an arbitrary bar impossibly high for the many.
Being the meritocratic society that we are, Americans revere excellence. We celebrate the Thomas Kellers, Steve Wozniaks, and Serena Williamses of the world because their success stories are more exciting than the far more common tale of the “jack-of-all-trades,” or even that of the reasonably accomplished chef, programmer, or tennis player. The reality is that despite the praise we heap on these prodigies, the majority of us build skills in a wide range of fields rather than specialize in any given one. Fortunately, research has shown that this may be to our advantage.
The Practice and Habit of Happiness
Published December 26, 2019
Views: 32,246
We often think of “happiness” as cheer or the kind of pleasure that comes from instant gratification. Stemming from the Greek thinker Aristtipus, this approach – called Hedonic happiness – suggests you should seek as much pleasure as you can and generally avoid as much pain as you can. You can see how this approach is a slippery slope: Addiction in all of its forms – from alcohol to shopping, gambling to Facebook scrolling – is fed by the dopamine rush of these pleasure palaces.
But there is another kind of happiness that derives from deep satisfaction and fulfillment – a deep delight with all of life – that is especially relevant to new habit formation. While this delight is more enduring than the fleeting pleasures of cold ice cream on a summer day or the thrill of driving a new convertible, it doesn’t always feel good.
4 Tips to Effectively Ask for Help—and Get a Yes
Published February 28, 2020
Views: 18,832
As highly social animals, we humans depend on one another to learn and grow. What’s more, research shows that helping others actually makes us feel good and that generosity is likely an important evolutionary adaptation for our species. If we are hardwired for altruism, why then is it so uncomfortable for us to ask for help?
In a society that praises self-help and self-reliance, it is becoming increasingly difficult for us to ask our colleagues, friends, and even our family for the assistance we need. The mere thought of asking for help can eat away at our ego, undermine our confidence, make us question our abilities, and even paralyze us with anxiety. Yet in modern life—at a time when we are more digitally connected and emotionally detached than ever—the stark reality is that no one can go it alone.
Learning how to ask for (and accept) help is perhaps one of the greatest skills you can develop. Luckily, new research shows that asking for and actually getting help is a lot easier and less daunting than it seems.
